Teenager Discovers Parents Have Been Stealing Her Money to Pay Church Tax, Threatens to Involve the Police

"I was thinking about my mortal life, and they were thinking about my eternal life."

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Sophia Cantiller
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Your mind and body remain active as a result of learning. It aids in providing you with fresh perspectives on the environment around you.

Your neural connections are kept active, you gain new experiences, and your brain is trained to manage a variety of problems. Learning can be therapeutic for a troubled mind because it is stimulating and gratifying.

It helps in identifying your untapped potential. When you learn a new skill, opportunities to use that skill emerge, allowing you to apply your newly acquired skill set.

A new source of income becomes available as you acquire a new skill, and it also offers fresh methods for employing optimism. Additionally, keep in mind that being open to learning new skills builds confidence and fosters a growth mindset, which promotes your personal and professional development.

The OP understood all this, and at 17, she had already learned mechanic work from her uncle. She knows about cars, and her uncle helps her find cheap beater cars with easy fixes to flip on Craigslist and the marketplace.

They've been doing this since the OP got her permit, and over the last two years, she's been able to save enough money to comfortably attend the local junior college or go to a vocational school. Then the OP discovered that her mom, who had access to her bank account, had been paying tithe on her behalf without her knowledge. 

The OP Kicks Off Her Story with a Title

The OP Kicks Off Her Story with a TitleThe OP Kicks Off Her Story with a Title

They've Been Doing It Since the OP Got Her Permit and Over the Last 2 Years

They've Been Doing It Since the OP Got Her Permit and Over the Last 2 YearsThey've Been Doing It Since the OP Got Her Permit and Over the Last 2 Years

They Log into the OP's Account and Transfer Themselves the Money So That They Can Pay It

They Log into the OP's Account and Transfer Themselves the Money So That They Can Pay It
They Log into the OP's Account and Transfer Themselves the Money So That They Can Pay It

Understanding Family Dynamics and Financial Trust

In family systems theory, trust and financial transparency are crucial for healthy relationships. This teenager's discovery of her parents stealing money is not just a breach of trust but can also lead to feelings of betrayal and anger. According to researchers at the University of Michigan, such financial misconduct can significantly impact familial relationships, often leading to long-term emotional consequences.

Additionally, financial issues are among the leading causes of family conflict, as they often intertwine with personal values and beliefs.

The OP Said She Would Go to the Police If They Didn't Find a Way to Pay Her Back

The OP Said She Would Go to the Police If They Didn't Find a Way to Pay Her BackThe OP Said She Would Go to the Police If They Didn't Find a Way to Pay Her Back

OP Has Offered the Following Explanation for Why They Think They Might Be the A-Hole:

I think I would be the a-hole because it is just money, and if it weren't for it being for my schooling, I wouldn't care as much. Also, my uncle is the most level-headed adult in my life, and he says not to. I feel like it would be justified because they literally stole from me, and they talk about how bad stealing is all the time.

The Reddit Post Received Hundreds of Comments, and Here Are Some of the Topmost Ones Below

The Reddit Post Received Hundreds of Comments, and Here Are Some of the Topmost Ones Below
The Reddit Post Received Hundreds of Comments, and Here Are Some of the Topmost Ones Below

Reminding That Hell Awaits a Thief

Reminding That Hell Awaits a ThiefReminding That Hell Awaits a Thief

Adolescents often face challenges in navigating their autonomy with parental authority, especially regarding finances. Developmental psychologists emphasize that this conflict can serve as a critical point for identity formation, where teenagers assert their independence and values. This situation illustrates a common struggle between parental expectations and adolescent self-determination, which is crucial for healthy development.

There Are a Lot of People Giving the OP Really Bad Advice

There Are a Lot of People Giving the OP Really Bad AdviceThere Are a Lot of People Giving the OP Really Bad Advice

There Is No Chance of the OP Getting Her Money Back from the Church

There Is No Chance of the OP Getting Her Money Back from the ChurchThere Is No Chance of the OP Getting Her Money Back from the Church

Edit for More Information Since It Was Asked of the OP

The account is not a joint account; my parents helped me open it and knew my passwords. I've already changed them.
After looking and doing the math and triple-checking everything, I have around 7-8k missing.

The OP Will Be an Adult Soon

The OP Will Be an Adult SoonThe OP Will Be an Adult Soon

The Psychological Effects of Financial Misconduct

Research in behavioral psychology indicates that financial betrayal can lead to emotional distress, including feelings of anger, anxiety, and sadness. These emotions are often compounded by the realization that one’s own family has violated personal trust. A study published in the Journal of Family Psychology found that financial misconduct can lead to long-term relational damage, impacting future familial interactions.

The OP Should Contact the Church and Tell Them

The OP Should Contact the Church and Tell ThemThe OP Should Contact the Church and Tell Them

The OP Could Also Threaten and See What Happens

The OP Could Also Threaten and See What HappensThe OP Could Also Threaten and See What Happens

They've Made Deposits for the OP a Few Times

They've Made Deposits for the OP a Few TimesThey've Made Deposits for the OP a Few Times

To cope with such betrayals, experts recommend establishing clear communication about financial matters within families. Open dialogues can help restore trust and create boundaries, ensuring that all family members feel respected and valued. Family therapy can also be beneficial, providing a safe space to express feelings and work through conflicts.

Realizing your value as you develop your skill set makes you joyful and mentally healthy. When presented with a new challenge, your new skills will come in handy because you'll have more time and space to help you adjust to the change.

So imagine someone taking out the proceeds of your work without even telling you. Redditors understood the OP, and she was declared not the AH.

Expert Opinion

This situation illustrates the complex interplay between trust, financial behavior, and emotional health within families. When financial boundaries are violated, it not only affects the immediate relationship but can also have lasting implications for the emotional well-being of all involved. Encouraging open discussions about finances can help rebuild trust and improve familial relationships.

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In conclusion, financial issues within families often reflect deeper psychological dynamics and can significantly affect trust and emotional well-being. Understanding these factors is essential for resolving conflicts and fostering healthier family relationships. By promoting transparency and open communication, families can mitigate the negative impacts of financial misconduct.

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